Getting ready for the "BIG STORM"

Ok I get it... There's a huge storm coming blah blah blah... Yes we will probably see alot of snow but sometimes these weather guys are CLUELESS!! LOL I'm just glad I got home safe today. I would take weeks of snow over one day of freezing rain (don't get any ideas though Mother Nature).. Driving on snow really isn't too bad. Well that is unless you are driving up a major incline or something. I don't know... All I know is if it's gonna snow then bring it on! I'm just so sick of hearing about it! LOL At least it waited for a majority of the snow from the last storm to melt. So yaaay for small favors!

In other news... I went back to First Southern Baptist Church I believe it's called, yesterday with some friends and they had a guest speaker... He was a former Muslim born and raised in a Sunni family in Lebanon who became a Christian in 1985 after not wanting to live under the Muslim faith any longer. I thought it was fascinating how he compared Islam to Christianity and it really made me beam with pride on how much Christians look out for their fellow men and want to do unto others as they would do unto themselves, whereas the Muslims believe that killing for their god Allah brings them closer to their heaven. I'm sure i'm distorting this some but in the last few months I have really grown closer with God and his teachings and it has made my life so much more fulfilling. Sure I still have bumps in the road but so does everyone. I have put my life in God's hands and have finally realized that He is showing me the path that will lead to a better life for myself by looking at the best in situations instead of the worst. And that everything happens for a reason. It may not be a reason we want it to be but we can learn from any and all situations that we encounter and grow stronger because of it!

Lots of things on my mind lately....

Ok first off I'm getting really aggravated at work lately... There's two people at work that claim they are great Christians or they go to church or whatever... but every chance they get they are talking behind people's backs and most of the time it's about me. Now I know I'm not the prettiest girl or the skinniest (but I'm working on it) and I may not do my hair and makeup for hours on end but that still doesn't mean I'm not a human being. I guess this is related to my earlier post where I don't think people should have to preach the gospel to be able to believe in it. It's just so frustrating! For the most part I feel like I'm on an upswing in my life and am loving life at the moment. I guess my biggest wish is that I would just get hired on permanently... I feel like God has a purpose for me working where I work because He knows at some point things will work out for the best and I will be hired on but my patience is wearing thin.

Another thing on my mind is getting to see my niece and nephew (well my parents and sister too lol) in May... They are visiting my parents right now and I'm trying to get them to decide when they want to come visit. I'm heading to NC regardless because one of my most favorite cousins is getting married and I wouldn't miss it! :) My sister has said that she would come with my niece and nephew so I can spend time with them and so I'm really excited about that! :) I'm just trying to decide what to do because I wish I could spend a week with them but since I'm only a temp employee I don't get that much paid time off. So we shall see what happens!

I hope everyone has a great weekend!!

New insights into God and my beliefs...

As I have been spending a lot of time alone these past few weeks I've been talking with God and really building a relationship with Him. Went to a friend's church this morning because I'm still looking for a church to call "home" and it just didn't feel right. The female pastor that was speaking was talking about how us as children of God need to go out and share the Word with others... Well coming from a background of parents who did believe in God but didn't go to church on a regular basis I was taught that you form your own opinions and own thoughts about how you came to be in this world and whether or not you believe in God is your choice. I've always believed in God myself, although my mind has been led astray from time to time. I know that He has a plan for me and I know he wanted me to move to Kansas for a reason. To grow up, to find myself, and to make a life for myself without depending on my parents all the time.  I still feel like I depend on my parents ALOT more than I should but everyone has someone they lean on the most... whether it be a spouse, a parent, a child, etc... Mine just happen to be my parents.

I just really want to find a church that I can share fellowship  with and hopefully minister to children in some way. I want to have a pastor that I can trust that can help pray with me when times are rough, and not make me feel like I need to share the word of God with others. I just want to be able to share the Glory of God with my fellow church members and if anyone asks me about God I would be more than happy to share my thoughts and feelings. I do miss not having people to bounce things off of and hope that someday God will give me someone who will not necessarily share the same thoughts and feelings but will truly listen to me and be able to give me feedback. Until then I have blogging and being able to get my thoughts out in the open does help.

Its the weekend!

Well it's the weekend!!!! I'm keeping it low key this weekend and just taking time for meditation and trying to see what God has planned for me in the coming year. I'm at a crossroads with my job at the moment. I really want to see if I can get a city job (since I'm just a temp at the moment) or if in the spring I need to move on to other ventures. I for the most part love where I work but always feel like I'm the "expendable" one and even though I've worked there almost 2 years now that's pretty much true. I have learned that my ex has moved on to someone else which is good because he seems to need someone in his life to help show him direction... This winter I've been missing his son like crazy... I loved me some Justin time and would love to just go out just me and him and play in the snow or something but I know that would make me have to interact with his dad and I'm just not in that place where I can do that right now. I know Justin probably thinks I abandoned him and that just breaks my heart but your heart wants what it wants and James's heart just didn't want me anymore and I'm finally in a place where I'm ok with that.

I'm at a place in my life where I wish I could afford to have a child of my own and if I can get a better career I would love to be a foster parent at some point. Children are blessings from God and I'm blessed that I have friends and family that have small children who I adore! I don't know I guess I just thought I would always be a soccer mom because I am good with keeping a schedule, for the most part, and think I would make a good mom at some point. But I'll be 34 this year and not sure if I want to have a baby this late in my life... Which makes me a little sad but I'm beginning to be ok with it. I'm hoping to find a church in the next few months where I can be a helper in the children's ministries there. I have a longing to be around children because they are so innocent and do not know alot of the bad things of this world. Although some children aren't so lucky. I just feel like it's my time to make a difference in this world and I just have to get the motivation to do it!

I really like being able to get all my feelings out here and just sharing with my blog friends makes me feel so much better!

Reflecting about this past year and what's to come in my life...

I've been doing a lot of thinking these past couple of months. I really have grown a lot since I've moved to Kansas. And especially since April of last year when I've really really had to be completely on my own... Well ok not completely but with great friends and family by my side I'm living independently. I still have many lessons to learn though.

As some of you know I just got a new car. Suzi the Saturn has been retired! After 14 long years it was time to move on. I promised myself if I did get another car that I would take better care of it and I'm going to stick by that promise. I just signed all the papers today and so now it's legally mine! It drives so nice too.

I'm really at a crossroads with my job right now. I want to stay because there's a possibility that I could get a job with the City of Topeka once one opens up... But on the other hand being a temp with hardly any benefits is not working out for me so much. God is helping me through this and I hope by leaving it in His hands he will guide me where I need to be.

I am loving Kansas except for all this snow we're getting these past couple of weeks... It helps to have a more dependable car now. I'll always be a Southern girl at heart and will never rule out moving back there (especially if my sister and her family end up moving out there) but for now I'm happy where I'm at and plan to be here for a while at least.

Hope everyone is having a great week and I'm loving this blogging thing!

Snow is not my friend....

Ok so I'm cooped up in this apartment and this is the first time my internet has gone crazy slowwwww.... I wouldn't be so upset about it but Nila and Eli and my sister are at my parents house and since I just got on the Skype wagon I have tried to Skype with them at least every other night. My sister doesn't have a good connection at her house in New Mexico plus she's always busy so I thought this would be the perfect time to see the kids. Well Mother Nature had other ideas!!! Ugh... We're supposed to get up to 9 inches of snow from today til tomorrow morning. I really do love Kansas but this snow can go away. I do like how they plow the roads and they have an "emergency route" that they keep plowed so people can drive on it. I just hope I make it to work tomorrow!

I cannot wait til May! Not only will I get to see my niece and nephew for the first time in almost 2 years but I'll get to see my dear cousin Amy get married. I just have to suffer these next few months is all... LOL

If anyone wants some snow come to Kansas we've got plenty!

My very first post on my very first blog!

Hello World! It's me Marcie! I just wanted to point out that this blog is mainly so people who know me can know a little more insight about what makes me tick (like you even want to know anyway lol) and to share stuff along the way. I like trying to stay up to date with current events and such so I will post articles when I feel there's a need to or if I want to start a discussion or something.

It may be boring at first as I'm trying to maneuver my way around but I hope you will stick around as the best is yet to come!